The Worst Movies of the 2000s

I've been sick since Sunday night. So, needless to say, I've had some time on my hands. And I went through wikipedia and the list of all the movies that came out this decade. And I made three lists: The Great, The Guilty, and The Garbage. Today, we begin with The Garbage. The Crap Movies that were made in the 00s. The ones that could have fed small countries instead hurt our minds and wasted our time. The only requirement to be on this list is that I actually had to watch it.

I present to you, in chronological order, The 33 Worst Movies I Saw in the 00s:

1. Down to You (00)
2. Someone Like You (01)
3. Cats & Dogs (01)
4. Down to Earth (01)
5. Driven (01)
6. Head Over Heels (01)
7. Sweet November (01)
8. Reign of Fire (02)
9. Walk to Remember (02)
10. From Justin to Kelly (02) *
11. Legally Blonde 2: Red, White, and Blonde (03)
12. Pirates of the Caribbean (03)
13. Little Black Book (04) *
14. Along Came Polly (04)
15. Bad News Bears (05)
16. Must Love Dogs (05) *
17. Sky High (05)
18. Stealth (05) *
19. Dukes of Hazzard (05)
20. The Guardian (06)
21. Material Girls (06) *
22. Bobby (06)
23. Because I Said So (07) *
24. In the Land of Women (07)
25. Spiderman 3 (07)
26. Shrek 3 (07)
27. Evening (07)
28. License to Wed (07)
29. Drillbit Taylor (08) *
30. Hancock (08)
31. The Ugly Truth (09)
32. Land of the Lost (09)
33. Bride Wars (09)

* = the crappiest of the crap

Tune Back in Tomorrow for The Great!

I'm Calling B.S.

It's November 4th.

Why is it almost 80 degrees outside?!?!?!?!?!

Ridiculous.

I want cloudy overcast days with the potential for rain. I want heavy fog. I want to curl up by a fire with hot chocolate. I'm going to be by a fire tonight...we're having a bonfire for bible study...but I'm afraid I'm going to need to wear a tank top to not want to die of heat exhaustion.

Come on FALL...show up!

The Things We See and Hear...

Things I witnessed on my Lunch Hour:

• woman driving a minvan while dressed as a cow and talking on her cellphone
• the song Thriller on 3 different radio stations
• 4 guys playing hacky sack in front of a tattoo shop
• woman wearing a shower cap and rain boots...NOT dressed up for Halloween
• a customer service lady wearing a green t-shirt and with a green soul patch. really not sure what she was supposed to be...

Thriller will absolutely be stuck in my all day now. It's definitely kickin' right now. And I posed this question to my friend earlier who said she loved Halloween music. What songs are there besides Monster Mash and Thriller?

rich vs.poor vs. poverty

In the words of the great Steve Martin in the movie The Jerk:

"I was born a poor black child.'

 Now, like Steve Martin, I was not actually born a poor black child. But for most of my life, I've lived at or below the poverty line. Growing up, I didn't really know this. But that's because of the reliance of my parents on the great evil that is credit cards and also because of the charity of others. Quite the combination. But, I was well dressed and there was food on the table. And a VW bus that the sliding door fell off of. My brother would often have to ride gripping the door handle to make sure it didn't fly off. Good times and character building. 

Growing up in the 80s, it was a material world, and that helped me to think I was a material girl. I'm a tomboy and pretty kickback but when I get things, I tend to want the best. I'm cursed with good taste (but luckily not in everything. I'm not ashamed to shop at the dollar store or list Taco Bell as a favorite restaurant). I got into a bit of trouble my freshman year at college. I had a Nordstrom card and South Coast Plaza was literally 5 minutes away. Plus, I was feeding a growing Roxy addiction...hungered by the close proximity to the beach (not that I surfed). 

My sophomore year at college, events happened which led to my dad losing the house and pretty much all of my childhood possessions. I was obviously devastated. Plus, I now had no home to go home to. Pretty rough. But here's the thing, even then I knew that it could be worse. I know that there will always be people worse off than me. Even after I lost my job as Director of Fun and spent 9 months unemployed, I knew that I was still fortunate to have all that I do.

The way I've looked at it, I've been houseless, but never homeless. I've been blessed by people who love me and help me and feed me. What I learned at my Americorps orientation is that means I'm rich in Social Capital. Which is the truth. I'm blessed. 

My new job requires me to live at the poverty line. When I told my uncle this the other day he was positive that it was illegal and couldn't be done. But I understand it. I'm working with refugees who are coming to America with nothing but a small bit of social capital. They've got a friend or family member who is taking them in. But the goal is for them to become self-sufficient. And really, that's my goal too. I miss having money (not that I ever had a ton to begin with). I miss paying all my bills on time. I miss being able to get in a car and drive somewhere spontaneously. I don't always have the right attitude and I've done my share of complaining and stressing, but in the end, I know I'll be a better person having lived this experience. I have my own place, I'm technically employed, I have a car that is still running (through I'm convinced the power of prayer), and I have a computer to be writing this on. I'm infinitely blessed. 

I know it's not Thanksgiving yet, but I'm thankful. Be thankful for all the blessings you have in your life, no matter how small.

What Netflix Thinks About Me

Ever wonder what your Netflix choices say about you? I got a taste of that today. I was a bit caught off guard when I actually looked at the categories Netflix decided I would be most interested in:

• suspenseful independent comedies
• goofy Action & Adventure
• imaginative Sci-Fi & Fantasy
• visually striking Dark movies (and yes, the Dark was capitalized. what does that mean?)
• Emotional 20th Century Period Pieces

I am a weird weird person...at least according to my movie tastes...just proves I'm eclectic...and a former Film Major.

But honestly, I don't know about you, but I tend to netflix the things that either no one else will see with me in the theater, or that I don't want to spend money on seeing in the theater, or old movies that I never saw in my childhood or haven't seen FOR-EV-ER. So, apparently that leads me to liking these types of netflix choices.

Oh well, I suppose it could be much weirder, right?

It's Back!!

I watched a leaf fall from a tree yesterday.

I walked out of my door this morning and was smacked in the face by the gloriousness of Fall. And I couldn't be happier.

No more baking while driving in my un-airconditioned Jeep.

Jeans, scarves, and sweaters get to start sneaking their way back into my wardrobe.

Giants baseball is winding down for the season (that I'm not happy about, but that's another time).

Soon I'll get to snuggle up in a blanket (though not a Snuggie. Saw it at Costco and determined that I'd never purchase one. But if someone bought one for me for Christmas, I'd probably use it)

I can use my heater.

My beverage of choice will be Apple Cider (until I can find the tasty wonder that is Wasil)

All I can say is...It's About Time.

Welcome Back Fall. I embrace you wholeheartedly!

A Return to Normalcy

I don't know what it is...16 years of school schedules...rotation of the earth...baseball winding down...but whatever it is, September seems to be when life goes back to normal. Don't get me wrong, summer is fantastic. Even when you are employed, there is just something different about summer life. But, maybe I'm more a creature of routine than I thought I was.

I'm pumped this week. This week, normal life returns with it's ordinary wonderfulness.

Last night, my bible study group started back up. It truly is a community, which is as rare as the Loch Ness Monster (or Ryan Garko) these days. But it does exist. And it's fabulous. We meet. We eat. (which will be potluck-style this year! Absolutely I am bringing Jell-O next week) We read. We discuss. We pray. It is simple and it is good.
And after bible study, I go play volleyball for 3+ hours. We've been up and down in our numbers but after about 7 years we've still got a good group. It's certainly changed through the years. Lots of people coming and going, one marriage, and its been equal parts trash-talking and endless support. A rarity to say the least. But it's a group that I love. We are a family as well. Basically, normalcy is exhaustion and soreness on Thursday morning. And I wouldn't have it any other way.

And this week, television begins it's fall return. Tonight: Bones (!), Fringe (which found itself the last half of the season and ended with a barrage of twists, turns, and jaw-dropping awesomeness. You should be watching. That's all I am saying), The Office (hooray!), and I already watched Community's first episode that is airing tonight. And it's entertaining. But the joys and tragedies of DVR and Thursday nights. Once Grey's returns next week (and based on my reaction every time I've seen the promo for the season premiere, I'll be an emotional wreck) the great debate on what to watch live/DVR and what gets to be watched online. I think NBC comedies are going to get the online treatment. Thanks to whoever's internet I'm borrowing in my apartment complex!

Life is back to normal. And I'm a big fan of that. Ü

Things I Miss...

• Back-to-School shopping. I love school supplies.
• Spectre.
• Extra Money.
• Traveling.
• Going shooting. Both shotgun and bow & arrow.
• Card catalogs.
• Writing in cursive.
• NYC.
• Having a Fridge with Built-in Ice Maker
• Telephones with cords
• Life before the internet
• Having phone numbers memorized
• Getting fancied up
• Brown Duckie
• Eating Meals with 50+ minor league ballplayers
• The Beach
• Newport Beach Public Library
• Running Around Lake Hollingsworth
• Tailgating at Candlestick
• Life before Twitter existed
• The Bethel Bazaar
• Rock-n-Bowling
• John Cheng Cookies & Chicken Bar Thursday
• Red Steer
• Riding in the bed of a truck
• Skiing
• Gas costing less than $1.00

ponderings and emotions

• this giants/dodgers rivalry is back full force and I love that! and thankful we didn't get swept.
• I've recently discovered Bejeweled Blitz on the facebook. I'm beyond addicted. But yesterday as I was playing, I had to wonder if my addiction was simply because I'm so awesome at the game (which I am) or because the voice telling you "Go" and other stuff is eerily similar to the "Finish Him" voice on Mortal Kombat II. That was a great game. Many hours of my youth was spent on my Sega Genesis playing that before my mom took it away because it was "too violent" I'm still bitter about that. That bitterness rivals only my bitterness of giving away my original Nintendo and my bitterness of not getting to watch Casper in 8th grade because there were ghosts involved.
• I'm ready for the new job. though it really has been a bit nice to not do much. but it shall be nice to have a purpose...not A Purpose-Driven Life, but just living with purpose. Yeah, there's a big difference.
• ready for some new TV shows to start up. I'm going through some withdrawals.
• I've said it before, I'll say it again: I HATE THE DODGERS, but I love Vin Scully.
• went to Target the other day and saw that all the seasons of Alias were only $12.99 a piece. That was disheartening when I thought about the fact that you could get all the seasons for how much I paid for one and a half. The curse of tv on dvd addiction.
• I'm excited for fall to get here. When I was in Monterey a couple weeks ago, there was fog, I wore jeans and a sweatshirt, I ate soup, it was glorious. I'm over the upper 90s. Bring on the fall!

weekend cable movie time

There is just something about the cable channels that know how to plan a movie marathon to suck you in. Especially on the weekend. Recently, I enjoyed a bountiful marathon on AMC of Hook, Rookie of the Year, and Ferris Bueller's Day Off (RIP John HUghes) it was beyond words amazing.

Anyways, so, today Stick It! (one of my favoritest movies) was on ABC Family. So, after watching the Giants lose I was watching the comfort food weekend cable movie marathons. But the movie that followed Stick It! was by far the one of the worst movies I've ever bore witness to. I couldn't even leave it on for background noise. It was so bad, I couldn't even "not turn it off to see the horrible badness that is actually funny how bad it is"----and this coming from a girl who owns Crossroads on VHS and watched all of the craptacular Nickelodeon tv movie Spectacular! The offender of the day was a "film" called Picture This "starring" Ashley Tisdale. Seriously bad. Not just the acting. But the storyline, the message it was sending out....I was outright offended. And it was using the story motive of Camelot. Poor Camelot....what did it ever do to deserve such a horrible fate?

So, basically, steer clear of Picture This if it ever comes and invades your Sunday afternoon TV watching. Any movies that you've ever dubbed "Too Bad to Even Watch and Make Fun of" ?

...this is it...

Yup. It took a No-Hitter to bring me out of blogging hibernation. But sweet lord almighty, what a great night, great story, great everything. Jonathan Sanchez...he of endless potential...became a major part of history when he needed it most. Even I had suggested that Sanchez may be best suited for the bullpen. Proved wrong tonight. And then his dad had to come and smother him in a huge hug in the dugout afterwards....I'm a sucker for that. I mean...I lost it watching the perfect game in For Love of the Game. Anyways, it was a proud night for a Giants fan. Especially after Lincecum took a no-hitter into the 7th last night. And Cain going tomorrow night. All of this has led me to a major conclusion/decision/belief---

This is It.

This can and may and should be the season. It's got all the telltale signs. Look at the White Sox of 2005, the Tigers in 2006, the Phillies last year. I'm feeling it. Been feeling it since Spring Training. And that feeling has intensified as the season has progressed. The guys have stepped up. I know there's still the second half but I gotta say, I'm feeling good about this season. 

Yeah Giants.